Bucher Marvin

About last week
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Hello everybody,
I hope 2018 has been good to you so far. First of all I hope you’re healthy and that you stay healthy. In this Blog I would like to talk about prejudice and false assumptions again. I personally try not to have any prejudice or jump to conclusions but as every human being I am bound to do it subconsciously. But because I have experienced what it feels like to be judged to quickly I try to make a conscious effort not to do the same to my surrounding people. You have all heard the saying: Treat other people how you would like to be treated yourself. I have a good example for this that happened to me this week.
Berlin is a huge city with 4 million people living there. In my eyes it is like the New York of Europe. There are so many individuals that it is hard to not get lost in the masses. What I am trying to say is that seeing so many faces every day you start generalizing and increasingly judging people on their appearance subconsciously and usually in a negative way. A friend and I were walking around Town to find locations for pretty pictures when a woman walked past us. I am sorry if this comes across mean but she looked really rough. She looked like she was at rock bottom. She asked us for directions to the train-station. That is when I knew something was wrong with her because we were standing right next it. I tried to help her find her train when she started sobbing which I couldn’t just ignore and I asked if she was okay. She told me that the day before her son had past away. I was so ashamed of myself for what I had thought about her appearance before. She just walked away without saying another word. Me and my friend were absolutely shocked and decided to also board another train to the zoological gardens because we just needed some air after that.
When our train got into the station and we wanted to board we saw that it was really full because there was going to be a soccer match that night and no one was getting off. But then a guy with watery eyes came running out the train, bumped into me and stood on my white sneakers. Of course, I was mad but I was so curious why he was so upset that I decided to board the same train as him and try and figure out why he was crying. I know it is kind of rude but I was listening in on his conversation. Turns out that he had just gotten the news that his father had past away. That one hit close to home because I know what it is like not having a father.
After those harsh lessons on prejudice I learned that day I got dragged along to a home-party. It was a birthday party and most of the guests were South-American or Black. It was pretty fun and chill until it took quite a drastic turn when a dude decided to try and steal the TV… Let me try to explain why he thought that would be a good idea and why it is so funny. University students in Berlin generally don’t have a lot of money and when they party they don’t rent out a lounge or something. What they sometimes do is rent out an apartment over Airbnb for a weekend and party with the owner. The Owner was a Latina and, contrary to what the guy thought, wasn’t all that drunk and did not think it was funny at all when some random drunk guy tried to leave her apartment with her TV stuck under his jacket. As a little help for you to imagine how that might have gone down I posted a video on Youtube where you can see what happened during the last week.
That reminds me I have to add something to the part in the video with Asian restaurant. After 4 bites of the food I had to throw up because the shrimps were spoiled. I went to the owner to let them know. They offered me some homemade tea to make up for it and that was also expired! The employee tried it too and spit it out in front of everyone. So, I got my money back along with a sleepless night because I felt so sick. But hey Berlin Lifestyle and also with less water in my system my leg-muscles look banging. But all jokes aside I hope you like the video.
As always thanks for the support and see you next time.

Best Friends
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Hi guys,
I hope you liked my last blog. As I told you last time, I am doing this so you get a chance to get to know me and get a glimpse of my life. You get to see who I am, what I do, and why I do what I do. So that the rumours can finally end.
Today’s topic: When one door closes another one opens.
When I changed schools and me and my first love got more and more distant. I decided at age 15 not to think about her anymore or more accurately to bottle the feelings up and lock them away.
Unfortunately, that plan didn’t work out well at all. When I heard that she started dating another guy I tried to ignore it and drowned my sorrow in alcohol. It was around “Fasnacht” a Swiss tradition to chase winter away. It is basically carnival. In my eyes, it is an excuse to get drunk during the week and show up to class still drunk. In Sins where I am from it was a big event. We even got time off of class to prepare for the parade. But not me because I went to school in Zurich and Fasnacht is not a nationwide tradition. In the evening I decided to go out anyways to let my friends know that I was still around. The whole school area had been decorated for a big event. There were large tents and there were bars in the gyms.
When I walked into the first tent the first thing I had to see was how my first love made out with her new crush. It hurt me quite a bit but I tried to not let it show. On my walk home I texted my teacher to let him know that I wouldn’t make it to class the next day. He knew that I wasn’t doing so well mentally and our relation in general wasn’t ordinary.
When I got home a friend of mine called and asked me if I wanted to go to Luzern for an event called “Urknall” early in the morning. In some cities like Luzern and Basel, Fasnacht is a really big deal and people from all over flock to events in those places. Fasnacht to them is more than just a silly tradition, it is a part of their lives. We even call it “the fifth season” sometimes. Because I didn’t want to sink into self-pity I decided to go. You know how that goes, you try to get over something so you don’t want to be alone stuck in your room all day. When we arrived in the city a guy told us that it actually wouldn’t start until 6 am which was a little unfortunate because we took the last train into the city late at night. And because it was during the week there wouldn’t be another train until 5 am. We met a couple new people who were a bit older than us. They had bought too much booze and gave us some because they didn’t want it anymore. I had never been drunk before. I am telling you this because what happened next was due to my naivety towards alcohol. The whole night I thought about why she had moved on so quickly and I wasn’t able to enjoy myself at all. I lost interest in being there rather quickly and decided to grab a snack from the bakery and take the first train home. The bread was really dry and all I had to drink was a bottle of Red Label whiskey. In my ignorance, I decided it would be a good idea to have a piece of bread with whiskey for breakfast. I think you can guess what happened next. I drank the whole bottle and the next thing I remember is waking up in my bed that evening covered in my own vomit. My mom had no idea because at my home I was still an innocent child. I had never smoked or drank alcohol because sports were everything to me at that age. The best thing about the whole thing was that the whiskey had burned my throat so badly that it hurt really bad to swallow anything. My throat felt like a jellyfish was wrapped around it. But I didn’t know that when I woke up so the first thing I tried to eat was French fries without any sauce and after that Nutella bread without anything to drink. It hurt so bad that I didn’t know what to do so I just laid down on the floor, cried, and tried not to swallow for as long as possible. After a while my mom came to check on me and the only thing she said to me was: “I have always known that you were a dumbass.” She went back to her room and acted like nothing had happened. After I had recovered a bit I had an emotional breakdown and the only thing I could think of was trying to reach my friends over Facebook. I just wanted someone to talk to and of course I still had some alcohol in my blood. At some point, I was able to sleep and the next day my day one bro came to wake me up. He noticed the smell immediately and asked me if I drank too much the night before. I told him I didn’t remember. He didn’t care much and asked mem if I’d go to the City with him. I got ready and noticed that my jacket was really dirty. I actually thought someone threw up on me… I fried my brain quite a bit with that bottle. I also had no idea that I messaged a bunch of people over Facebook. I got a bunch of worried replies asking what was wrong but I didn’t remember anything myself. When I was done with checking all my messages we were late for our train so we had to run to the train-station. In the city, the fasnacht-party was going on. My bro really wanted to hit on girls. I wasn’t really all that into it but in the midst of all the costumes I spotted two eyes and a smile that gave me a certain sense of security. She stood there with her friend and they were mesmerized I didn’t hesitate, went over to them and started talking to them: “Excuse me, can you tell me where the fasnacht is at?” And that is how I met my best female friend. We met 2x after that, one time in a soccer camp in a camphouse a town next to ours and the second time I just visited her. She was the calmest person I had ever met, the complete opposite of me. I liked her so much that I went overboard and I wanted to start dating after the second meeting. All my sorrows were just gone when I was with her. But there was a problem. It took 1h to get to her place and I still went to school in Zurich. I didn’t want the same thing to happen again and didn’t want to hurt her. But what I didn’t realized at the time is that I hurt her no matter what because what I did instead was ignoring her and I didn’t message her anymore. After about a month of this she broke it off with me. That didn’t mean that it was over between the two of us though. Quite the opposite. She had always been about finding solutions over just beating around the bush which I really appreciate. She had a little brother who really liked me I wonder to this day why he did. I got along really well with her parents to and do so to this day. Her mom liked me because I helped her clean the table after meals and just have small-talk with her. With her dad I got along even better because he was a sport-freak like myself. We talked about all kinds of sports. The thing that separates my best female friend from other women is that she knows me through and through but what I think is so special about her is that she respects me needing my space. She never complained about me not messaging her enough because we just had a special connection. Sometimes half a year passes without talking to each other but then when we do talk on the phone or in person it seems like that time apart never happened. At the moment, she has a boyfriend and is very happy with him. From time to time we facetime and give each other updates of our lives. I hope it will stay like this for a long time.
When I was 18 I offered her that if we were both still single at 30 we’ll get together.
Because our personalities are so different I came to the conclusion that there could never be anything more than friendship between us mainly for one reason: I like to live in the moment and she likes to be really structured and plan everything she can. It isn’t that I could compromise but I think to make it work with there would be just too many compromises and neither of us know if it would change things for better or for worse. It is better the way it is now. She often says that I give her a feeling noone else does. I asked her a lot of times what she meant by that. The more I think about it the clearer it got. I questioned and doubted myself so much but she just accepts me the way I am with all my flaws. I wish everyone in the world had a person like that. Someone you can just always rely on and always has an open ear for your problems.
If she is not at work she replies in 3 seconds and is there for me immediately. I really appreciate that.
Okay I think that is enough for today. I just want to let you know what keeps me stable and gives me strength. And the people around me play a major role in that.
My Motto: Treat people how you would like to be treated.
Thanks to everyone who keeps up with my blog.
As always thanks for your support and see you next time.

Happy New Year

ONE OF MY FIRST
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Hi friends,
As I have led on, here is a story about my first girlfriend. I like how Rick Sanchez thinks about relationships: “The thing people call love, is just a chemical reaction connected to animalistic mating instincts. It hits hard in the beginning but then fades away and you are stuck in a failed marriage.” I personally wouldn’t go as far as one of the greatest comical minds of our time, but I do agree with him a little bit.
I was 13 when I had my first girlfriend. For a lot of you that might sound a little bit young and you think that it must have been a childish thing. I can just tell you that it felt real for me at the time. Before I had my first kiss I let Youtube teach me all I needed to know. I spent hours watching videos how the first kiss should happen with someone you really liked. Let me tell you how I got to know her first.
On a beautiful Sunday afternoon, my neighbour and his Bosnian countryman played soccer outside. In my town, there were 3 soccer-fields. One was usually reserved for the first team and us kids were only allowed if there was no sign on the field that said it was prohibited. So, it was always a big deal for us when we got to use the main court. Me and my boys played our silly games but because we were only a trio we were looking for another playmate. Next to the soccer-field sat a close friend of my sister and her friend. We asked them if they
wanted to join our game and the promptly agreed. They beat us quite badly but it was still a lot of fun. When I got home I went to check my messages. It was the time before Facebook and Instagram were even a thing. MSN and Netlog were still popular back then. If you don’t know those two; MSN was a chat room where you could text, play games and talk over the webcam. Netlog was sort of like Facebook or Instagram where you could post pictures but you had the option to see who visited your profile and how often they did so. So, you could basically stalk other people. When I opened my mails, I had a notification that I got a new contact on MSN. Back then it was our goal to get as many contacts as possible, kind of like it is today with followers on Insta, so I usually had a lot of requests because everyone followed everyone, whether you knew them or not. But on that day, one name immediately caught my
eye because I had heard it earlier that day. I didn’t pay much attention to it though. If I could go back I would do a lot of things differently.
I messaged her and acted like I didn’t know who she was. I asked her questions like: “Where did you get my MSN address from?” We texted for about six months and met up on a regular basis until we reached the point where I wanted to get out of the friend-zone and tell her how I felt. I was 13 at the time and the whole thing had quite an impact on me. I can’t find the words to describe my feelings for her. It just felt right. Let me tell you a little bit about her in order for you to understand a little bit better why I fell in love with her. These are my subjective opinions so bear with me. For me she is incomparable with anyone else up until this day. Her smile left me breathless. Her behaviour was the complete opposite of myself. Because of her I realised why the saying; “opposites attract” was so popular.
She was so nice and when we got more serious, we kept it a secret for a while. She wanted to keep it a secret more than me though. Facebook just got popular and I wanted to flex right away and show everybody that we were a thing. Looking back, I regret that a little bit because it was really special when it was still our secret. The people who were close to me would have known without Facebook but even they never really saw us together. We usually met somewhere we were sure no one would bother us and just cuddled and talked for hours because we had such different views of the world.
Relationships are based on differences and compromises. At the end, we could always agree on whatever we were discussion though, except for one thing. When was I allowed to kiss her? It took a long time until she allowed me to kiss her. The reason was because she wanted our first kiss to be spontaneous and cliché. But me being a thirsty nigga couldn’t wait that long. Winter was coming and it was time to introduce my first girlfriend to my family. My mom still gives me a hard time about it to this day. How I started cleaning my room a week before and arranged everything meticulously. I invited her on a Saturday afternoon but of course on exactly that day my relatives came to visit. We watched WALL.E together and after a month of waiting I gathered all my courage and kissed her. I had butterflies in my stomach and I knew that never wanted to forget that moment. When I changed schools, we started to see each other less right away and two weeks later she stopped contacting me altogether. That time was already hard enough for me. I really struggled with going back and forth between Sins and Zurich together with having to make new friends and everything that comes with that. Now I am telling you a secret that to this day only my wannabe black friend knew. (He is a ginger and calls himself “Day-Walker”) I was at rock bottom because I just changed schools and my girlfriend had been ignoring me for two weeks. I told him to send her a text that I had cheated on her. With only four words I completely changed every future relationship I will ever have. She contacted me immediately. Me being a stupid kid tried to act all tough and didn’t give her a real answer to her simple question if I had cheated on her. She got mad and stopped messaging me. Now there is a message that all the newly single bois can get behind. A man only realises what he had after it is gone. Right after she stopped talking to me I realised that I had fucked up and tried to reach her again. Without success. She didn’t want to hear my apologies nor an explanation. That was the first time I cried because of a woman and was left heartbroken. That time really was hell for me. When she broke up with me I tried to supress my emotions. The problem was that I just warped into other emotions like anger, fear and disappointment even though I knew that it was all my fault. The only thing that helped me during that time was soccer. The guys in my team were like family for me. Weeks later she wanted to talk to me and it turned into an on/off relationship that lasted about a year. After that it really ended because you just moved into different directions as people. I started going out more and tried to drown my sorrows that way. Unfortunately sleeping with countless other women didn’t help at all and up until about 3 years ago I was still thinking about her. What changed my mind? Ç years ago, I sent her a message to congratulate for her birthday. It started the first conversation we had in years and she wanted to talk to me about something urgently. It was the coldest day of the year with -13C. You have no idea how much clothes I put on that day. The conversation went really well and she told me that she imagines us to meet again years later somewhere in the world when are both older with a lot of experience under our belt. Half a year later I talked to a friend of mine and she asked me why I wasn’t able to commit to anyone anymore. And I just wanted to tell someone about all this. I didn’t do it as extensive as I do now but I told her a hardcore short version of everything. Everything that happened, what could have been and that I had met her again recently. Her feedback was: “That girl still wants you.” Right after that I called her up and asked her to meet me because I wanted to talk to her. She told me that she couldn’t right now because she was right before her final exams and that it probably wouldn’t work out for a while because she was just so busy. Finals I understand but the second part was a little suspicious so I asked her why she won’t have time after her exams. I wish to this day I hadn’t asked her that. Because a little later she texted me: „I am in a relationship”. I went from heaven to hell real fast. I didn’t know what to do after that and I didn’t have anybody to talk about because me and my best homie had gotten into a fight. I woke up the next day with the realisation that I just had to delete her from my mind. After that I had no contact to her again and also didn’t have feelings for her anymore. Up until I met her just before I started my traveling adventure. I gotta tell you this woman gets more and more beautiful every time you see her. But I didn’t feel anything towards her anymore it was just really awkward honestly. I would like to tell you the ultimate turnoff but I think this has been enough lovey dovey for one day. 

thanks for your time and support.
see you soon.

THAT'S WHY
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Hi Guys,

In my last blog, I told you a little bit about the last couple years. Today I will focus on the topic of why I am the way I am. Why I feel most comfortable living my days without knowing what they are gonna bring. Let me turn back time to my first employer ever. They told me: “You should never expect something from another person, because maybe they can’t meet your expectations and you will only set yourself up to be disappointed.” Only two weeks later I already cancelled my contract with them. At first it didn’t bother me to much but after a while it upset me quite a bit.
When I was 14 years old I changed schools because I had a teacher who wanted to control me and we just didn’t get along. A lot of people would agree with me if I told you that he this teacher made me lose my motivation to go to school at all. Let me tell you a funny story about that.
Since I grew up with a lot of women at my home I got along with the girls in my class a lot better than a lot of my colleagues. With one of them I was especially tight and one time in gym class she hit me playfully and then actually tried to run away from me. Of course, I was a lot faster than she and after a little bit she pulled the emergency break and I slammed into her. We both fell to the ground. Meanwhile the teacher walked in and ordered the two of us to stay after class. I figured it wouldn’t be a big deal. I didn’t do anything wrong and nothing bad had happened. But boy was I wrong… After the class had ended my friend left the gym and the teacher let her go and only told me to stay. That already put me off a little bit. But not as much as what he said next. He said: “I am not in the mood to deal with this kind of stuff today so I expect you and your mother to meet me in my classroom tonight.” So, my mom and I went to this in-official parent teacher conference that night. I hadn’t been able to tell my mom why we were there because I didn’t understand it myself. The teacher then proceeded to just dive into the action. “Ms. Bucher, your son received a hand-job from another student in gym-class today.” You can’t imagine how shocked I was at that moment. My mom on the other hand took with a lot of humour. Long story short I switched schools shortly after that but I am still not 100% sure if that was the reason or not. It remains a mystery. Needless to say, after that incident, I didn’t enjoy going to school with that teacher anymore. The final blow was a note from him that said that he feels like I am just coming to class to have fun rather than learning anything. That really drained me from wanting to even try. It was just a lot of shit coming down at once.
I changed schools but going back and forth from Sins to Zurich at 14 years old, not so fun… I had a girlfriend at the time. She broke up with me just a couple weeks after I changed schools. I personally believe that love has no age-requirement it felt right to me at the time. Even though, it officially only lasted for 5 months it honestly has never really ended for me. But that is not important right now.
Moving the clock forwards again to the time of my apprenticeship. Once again, my contract had been cancelled and but I had 3 months where I could still go to class and find a new job to fill. There my philosophy of “people knowing people” came in clutch once again. A lot of my classmates had worked at Coop and so they encouraged me to apply at Coop to continue my apprenticeship. But at that time, I realized that I didn’t enjoy this job and so I tried to find something else. That was right around the time where I started getting into bodybuilding. I quickly started a course to become a fitness instructor because I didn’t want to have a blank period in my CV. The best thing that happened to me in that course was that I totally slept through my final exams but they let me retake them during my military service. I had a good reason to miss my exams though. I didn’t want to show it at the time but the loss of my father put me down quite a bit for about 6 months. It was at that time where I decided to change how I view my life: Don’t expect anything from a day going in but always hope. Because hope dies last.

THIS IS ME
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Hello everyone,
After extensive back and forth it is finally online. I am really excited to be able to share my experiences with you. First, I want to give another shoutout to Silvan Plattner for taking the time and translating my texts into English.
For you to know who I am and what I do I am telling you a little bit about myself in my first blog. My name is Marvin Bucher but people call me Brown Hary. “Why Brown Hary?” you might ask. When I was 13 we talked about online security and we had to choose a pseudonym. I was already a rebel back then so I picked ‘Hary’ with one ‘r’ because ‘Fuck the system’ right? I grew up in Switzerland in a cute town called “Sins”. The name says it all already. I grew up in the city of sins…
My mother was born in Kenya and I have 3 and a half siblings. One brother two sisters and a dog named Quimbo.
I am 21 years old and enjoy creating individual experiences for myself. I like to look at life as a book where my book should incorporate everything. Action, tragedy, a lot of emotions and suspense. That is also one of the main reasons I started this blog. It is to counteract any rumours that might spread and to ensure that my and your people know what is happening in my life. And I want to show the world how I go through life without making many plans. One example: You are in a situation that makes you think that something really good or exciting is going to happen to you. Maybe you are moving out, or you are starting a new job and naturally you tell all your friends about the thing. But then for some reason the thing does not happen and you were all hyped even though it wasn’t certain it would actually happen. That is how my life has gone for a lot of the time. I have noticed that if I go into a new situation with an open mind and just let the things happen without having high expectations going in, the result is oftentimes better than I could have hoped. That might sound naïve but stories to illustrate this way of thinking are coming up.
When I was about 10 years old I started playing soccer. I did this because my best friend left our playdates early on certain days of the week and when I asked him why he had to leave so early on these weekdays he replied that he was going to soccer practice. I went with him to soccer practice and I saw that a lot of other friends were there too. I was so intrigued that I decided to start playing too. The only problem was, that I had only played soccer in my neighbourhood before and I had to get soccer shoes and shin guards first. I was so excited to play that I forgot to tell my mom about the things I’ll need to play. The weekend after I already had my first game but obviously I didn’t have any gear yet. That is where my brother stepped in. He was 13 at the time. Before the game he put in extensive efforts to organize me some gear. Memories like that never die. Through soccer I made many new friends and I learned to appreciate being part of a group with the same interests. With 16 I started to become passionate about another thing and that was bodybuilding. Before I didn’t enjoy lifting weights that much and honestly disliked those fitness-guys quite a bit. The whole thing is kind of a funny story actually. An acquaintance of mine was looking for a workout partner and it was a time in my life where I started to get interested in girls and actually preferred going out over soccer-practice because practice was such a serious environment. I changed teams in the hope that I would regain some motivation but unfortunately the new club was even tougher and so it was really counterproductive. In that time, I started doing fitness on my own and I started to really enjoy it. Unfortunately, I could only do this for about three and a half years because then I had to go do my time in the army. After my time in the army my life changed forever and it has not been the same since.